AM I GETTING OLD?

 

Sahil asks himself: Am I getting old?

This may be weird but I am getting a feeling as If I have grown old. There are several things that make me think so.

• I no longer take interest in chats and long bakkar sessions.
• I no longer shed tears in a romantic movie or while listening to sentimental music.
• I have stopped coming online 24x7. I am not an active member on social networking sites like orkut and facebook.
• I no longer put eye-catching status messages on gtalk.
• I am happy with my old nokia 1600 set and don’t ask for a new phone with QWERTY keypad. I don’t even recharge my phone with a message card and have stopped replying to stupid “hi! watsup” messages.
• My emotions have become more pragmatic and less inclined towards anyone.
• I have become a stoical and nonchalant person who no longer gets hurt by people’s comments.
• I always say to people that “childhood was the best part of my life”. Doesn’t this clearly show that my childhood is over?
• I no longer go to canteen late in the night as I think that canteen food is insipid and aesthetically unfit.
• I can spend 350 bucks for a dominos cheese burst but will bargain even 5 bucks with a rickshaw tender.
• Whenever I see rain I want to go out and dance like a kid but I stop myself because I don’t wanna take the pain of getting wet and drying myself. Maybe I am afraid of water. Plus I think that I am too mature for such kind of nonsense. God! What has happened to me!
• I think that I have seen enough of chicks in my life and now am no longer get attracted or infatuated towards any hot girl. The feeling of falling in love seems to be buried ages ago. I have stopped building castles of love and fantasies in air (typical characteristic of a teenager).
• I no longer shout at or chuckle with my sister. Neither do I fight with my parents to fulfill any of my stupid fantasies.
• I no longer buy/want to buy the things that I always wanted to, the things that satisfied my tastes and passions.
• I start a novel but never reach beyond 50 pages. I don’t even watch a full movie at one stretch.
• I no longer love to play video/computer games and consider those as kids who do.
• I have started taking bath regularly (What the fuck!).
• I know my SWOTs (strength weakness opportunities and threats).
• My hairs have started falling and few have become white.
• The number of cosmetics that I use has fallen from 12 to 1. I have even stopped using facewash and prefer washing my face with soap.
• My stubble grows very fast.
• I have started valuing people in my life.
• I laugh at the things that hurt me once (the best part!).
• My views have become very diplomatic, political and phlegmatic. I am worried and feel very much insecure about my future.
• I have learnt sharp riposte for every touché through experiences.
• I love to advise people like their grandfather guiding them what to do and what not to do. I wish to help people with true heart and nothing fishy in my mind.
• I long for rejuvenation. I desperately do!

They say life begins at 60. But why I am feeling that life should end at 20? I think I urgently need a change in my life.

PS: Finally I have turned 20 which marked the end of my teenage.

PS: Thanks Amik, Garima, Neha, Prachi, Ankit and Samarth for making my birthday special. And yeah the card was so stupefyingly awesome. :)

PS: Today I ride my bicycle after 16 months. It felt very good. I love bicycling.

PS: I have joined CL (Career Launcher) classes for my MBA preparation.

PS: Nowadays life has become very tough, busy, hectic, miserable and pathetic. I have to manage many things simultaneously like MBA preparations, my core studies and reading hellnuma lot of magazines along with improving my GK and gaining knowledge about business world. I wonder how I will manage so many things!

PS: Addicted to Dominos pizza badly!

PS: A long journey ahead. Wish me good luck.

PS: Adios.

FRIENDSHIP IN RETROPECTION

This post is dedicated to all my friends whom I met at some point of time and had shared some good memories.

It was 1 in the night and I was lying on my bed trying to sleep. My cellphone beeped. I picked up the phone and read the message. It was a message from one of my friends with whom I haven’t been in contact from months. Probably from a year. It read “when a very sweet and close person goes too far from us, we may say or not say, but our heart says to their heart: u made me alone. Gud nyt !! ”

I don’t know whether what the message read was true and she meant it or it was just a message which you can get anywhere on any site on internet and people keep on forwarding to their as many friends as in their list just to utilize the full money of their message pack. But that message has raised a hellnuma lot of questions in my mind, not just about her, but about all my friends. For next 30 minutes I wasn’t able to sleep and was became preoccupied thinking about the time when we were friends. How occasionally we used to text and ring each other and suddenly. And suddenly all of a sudden both of us become preoccupied with our own jobs and even since day we didn’t even bother to contact each other. No calls and no messages. Even no “hi” on chats. That message reminded me of all my friends since my childhood, my school friends, my coaching friends, my college friends and other whom I met circumstantially. I was wondering how all of us drifted away with the flow of time without even knowing where the flow is seperating. I opened my contact list on my phone and tried reading all my contacts and to wonder there were dozens of friends whom I haven’t been in contact for months.

Ask from yourself. The people with whom you used to talk, call, message or chat two years ago, with how many of them you still are in contact with. Don’t count the number of “yes”. Count the number of those friends with whom now you are not in contact or perhaps haven’t asked about their whereabouts. It is obvious with time we make new friends and our friend circle keeps on increasing. We mix up with our new friends but ofcourse in the corner of our heart there are the memories with our old good friends which keeps the feeling of friendship alive. And whenever you introspect those memories it rejuvenates.

I happened to notice all those friends and tried finding the reason by we haven’t been in contact from months. With some of them I lost contact after summer vacations. Some of them changed their numbers. Some became busy in their exams. Some became busy with their job. We got preoccupied with our new friends that we didn’t wish to contact our old friends and soon lost the contact. And all of a sudden I wished to talk to all of those friends who made me feel special at some point of time. I thought of calling all those friends tomorrow to ask them how are they doing, to tell them I still care.

The next day I called all my friends my school friends, my coaching friends, everyone whom I can contact. And let me tell you everyone was surprised why all of a sudden I called them for without any reason. One friend even messaged me after my call saying “Sahil, you are impossible!”.

Was my act that silly?

I don’t know but I felt a little more complete after calling them. Yet they responded indifferently, and they weren’t that open with me as they used to be, but still it felt good. And I was happy for this little feeling called friendship.

PS: Call today all such friends if you haven't think of doing that in months.

PS: Happy Friendship Day.

PS: @all my friends: love you all !!